Christmas-Memories
by Vikay
Summary: Tonks had always loved celebrating Christmas with her family.


**Merry Christmas ^-^**

 **I felt like writing some Remadora again, so I came up with a cute little christmas-oneshot. Rated T due to language - nothing extreme but don't wanna risk anything xD**

 **Anyway, I hope you like it :)**

* * *

Tonks had always loved Christmas.

She did not know exactly what it was. Perhaps all these colorful, glittering lights that illuminated the icy winters. Or perhaps it was the tasty food and the pleasant smell which accompanied it. Or it was simply this peaceful atmosphere.

Christmas always had some loving and calm feeling stuck to it - even tough Tonks was not exactly a fan of silence. But now and then, it was quite nice, especially when it meant that her mother was not constantly complaining about something. On Christmas Eve, it seemed as if Andromeda was satisfied with the fact that they all sat happily together and spent a nice evening.

In fact, in her childhood, Christmas had been the only family party that had always ended well and which she had been looking forward to. Otherwise, there had always been some trouble under their roof, as Tonks had done something, which had by no means been bad, but somehow had made Andromedaexplode. But at Christmas everything was different. And, of course, presents were always a plus.

That is why even after Tonks had moved out she always visited her parents for Christmas. During her training as an auror she had hardly had any time to see them, which is why it was a great opportunity to spend some time with them – more would not have been good for their relationship anyway.

Even within her first year as an auror she had had to cancel a Christmas party with her colleagues – also because of the fact that the party was full of old, fat lonely men who wanted to get drunk, and this would surely not have been that much fun.

A hard decision was the refusal of Sirius' invitation a year later. Not because Tonks wanted to spend Christmas with Sirius at Grimmauld Place – there were better options. But she would have liked to be together with Remus.

 _"Oh, come on," Sirius said, not that sober anymore – not that he usually was. "Without you it won't be half the fun."_

 _"I know," Tonks replied, grinning. "But unfortunately, you have to sink into boredom. I've promised my parents to spent Christmas with them. But you've got me for the rest of the year, "she added, winking._

 _"I thought you and your mother don't get along that well," Remus interjected. "Didn't she just accuse you of being the worst daughter ever two weeks ago?"_

 _Tonks had to smile. She did not know if it was because Remus seemed to be listening to her complaints about her mother, or the fact that he wanted to persuade her to stay. Probably both. And she kind of wished she could just give up and say 'yes'._

 _"She's not that bad on Christmas Eve," said Tonks. "In addition, it means that she can't say I'd never visit her anymore," she added, grinning._

 _"I can talk to Andy if you want," said Sirius._

 _"No, you can't," Remus replied._

 _"Come one, I can leave this house for a few minutes," Sirius moaned._

 _Remus shook his head and sighed. Then he looked at Tonks and said, "Have fun with your family."_

 _He smiled at her and Tonks could not help but smile back at him._

Looking back, Tonks wished she had said yes. Maybe the following Christmas would not have been so bad that way. Or the memories would have made it even worse.

 _"You can spend Christmas with us," Molly told her as she poured them some tea. "We have enough space and food. You can also sleep here if you want. "_

 _"Thank you, Molly. But I have to reject, unfortunately," Tonks replied with a forced smile. "I'm celebrating with my parents. Like every year." That was a lie. She did not want to celebrate with her parents this time. She had no desire to celebrate Christmas at all. It was as if the whole spell of this wonderful time had extinguished._

 _Molly looked at her incisively, and almost sad. Then she said hesitantly, "Remus is coming too."_

 _Tonks paused._

 _She wanted to see Remus again. That would be the only present she could ever wish for. She had not heard from him for so long, let alone talked to him. It would be wonderful, but at the same time she was afraid._

 _Tonks feared that he would not want to talk to her, maybe not even really look at her. And that would kill her internally._

 _"Sorry," Tonks said. "But I can't."_

 _Molly sighed, but seemed to be satisfied with the answer._

It was the first Christmas Tonks had not celebrated with her family, and she regretted it. Even if she had not been able to go to the Burrow, she could at least have visited her parents for a few hours. But she had not wanted the two of them to see her so ... so gray. She had not wanted to give them any reason to worry about her. She had not wanted to answer questions. And she had not wanted to act the whole evening as if she was fine.

Surprisingly, a present from Remus had arrived the next morning. He had certainly meant it as a nice gesture, but it had made Tonks incredibly angry.

At that time, she could not have believed that she would actually spend the next Christmas with him.

 _"You really don't need anything?" Remus asked worried._

 _"I'm only pregnant," Tonks replied annoyed. "I'm fine. You can stop asking now. If I feel like shit, I'll tell you."_

 _"Oh, she definitely does," Andromeda interjected._

 _"Alright," Remus said, and sat down beside Tonks on the couch to put an arm around her shoulder. "I promise I'll never ask again." He gave her a kiss on the forehead._

 _Tonks laughed. "You can't keep that promise anyway."_

 _It did indeed bother her a lot that he was so overcaring and anxious, as these features were responsible for the pain he had put her through before. On the other hand, it was also something she loved about him. And what she loved even more was annoying him. Also, it was quite useful that she did not always have to get up if she wanted something to eat or drink or whatever._

 _Remus just laughed and pulled Tonks closer to him. Tonks put her head on his shoulder and enjoyed peace for a few seconds. This evening was so beautiful that one almost forgot the war, though not completely, because an important person was missing._

 _Tonks did not think her mother looked very sad. In fact, Andromeda had a slight smile on her lips as she sat opposite her and Remus and looked at the two of them. But Tonks did not let her mother fool her._

 _"Can you get the wine?" Tonks asked Remus._

 _He looked at her in surprise._

 _"Yeah, yeah. I'm pregnant," she said, rolling her eyes. "A sip won't kill the child. I want to drink a toast to Dad," she added seriously._

 _There was silence for a moment, then Remus cleared his throat and said, "I'll get the bottle and glasses."_

 _When he had left the room, Andromeda looked at her daughter and said softly, "Thank you."_

 _Tonks smiled._

It had been a wonderful Christmas. For once, they had laughed a lot, and not only because Tonks had forced it out of the other two. Everything had felt peaceful and warm for a short moment.

It was one of the best Christmases she had ever celebrated. Fortunately, Tonks had not known that it was also her last.


End file.
